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One week in

06/12/2010

After one week of blogging, trying, I hope successfully, to avoid the banal –

A few thoughts.

I’m glad I finally did this. I’d only been thinking about it for a year or so. If I’m good at anything at all, it’s procrastination.

People have stopped by, and a few have left a comment. Nice. I’d like more of that.

This past week, I’ve posted something every day, but I’m going to drop back to three times a week. I’m doing this in part because the rest of my life, the mundane agenda – earning a living, looking for a boyfriend, laundry –  needs ongoing attention.

I’m also cutting back to three-a-week because I have a deep-seated fear that I’ll run out of things to say. Most people who’ve known me for more than fifteen minutes will find this concept absurd. I’ve always been – how shall we say this? – chatty. How about verbose? Nonetheless, a deep seated fear is a deep seated fear, and we’ll just have to work with it. If I find myself bustin’ at the seams with ideas, I can go back to posting more often.

I have a request.

Talk to me. Comment. If you agree and think I’m brilliant, that would be nice. But all are welcome. Even if you disagree, or think I’m an asshole, or an ignoramus. You can even tell me I’m not a good writer. That would really sting, but I’ll try to take it like a grownup.

And if you think this stuff is good – or even just OK –pass it along to somebody who might need it.

The deal is this:

If this blog helps some poor, suffering slob – the guy I was two years ago – deal with his situation, I’ll be very happy.

Maybe he’s finally come out and, like me, hasn’t a clue about what the hell to do next. Or maybe he’s in the middle of a lawyer-infested, financially ruinous, shit-storm of a divorce, his kids and his mother aren’t speaking to him, and he’s wondering if he’ll ever see the other side of it. He can, and most likely will, get to the other side in one piece. But shining a little light along the path sure wouldn’t hurt.

So talk to me and help me spread it around.

And one more thing –

I’d like this blog to become a resource for the struggling, the confused, and the flat-out lost. A late-blooming guy can need all sorts of help getting to his feet – legal, mental, spiritual. Real estate. Dating. It gets complicated.

Do you have a great therapist? Have you found a spiritual community that sort of saved your life? Did volunteering at the AIDS clinic help you put it all into perspective? There may be someone living right down the street from you who needs to know.

So, tell me about it. Tell me – us – about whatever helped you get through the process and bloom into the beautiful gay man you are. I’d like to share that info with others.

Thanks,

David

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6 Comments leave one →
  1. nanci Reese permalink
    06/12/2010 11:43 PM

    Dear David,
    I think you are doing a wonderful service. Like in AA or OA we show those behind us the light along the way. There is nothing like somebody who has been there to talk/ e-mail. I love SF cuz pretty much anything goes and everybody is pretty accepting of sexual orientantion not to mention ethnicity.
    Several years back I took some courses at City College by a dynamite professor. he went on to Yale and SUNY and is mounting a GLBT show at the Smithsonian 10-10-10. I took 3 courses- History, ART, and ARt and culture of the 50’s and 60’s. He deconstucks9sp) paintings etc and show the subtle stuff about it. He has outed Jasper Johns and Raushenberg.
    The 3 courses I took were very informational. One wild story is after Stonewall and then women’s lib started in the 70’s there was a woman’s commune and they would not allow cucumbers or bananas at the commune!!
    The word “homosexual” wasn’t even coined until either the last 1800’s or early 1900’s. Native Americans allowed for different orientations. they called them “Twin Spirit” and if a young man or woman wanted to women’s work or men’s work they let that happen. I think in it was Greece or Rome I forget. It was common place for and older married man to take a young boy as a lover. then when the young boy got older then he did that too. And if you noticed movies or literature up until lately they would have homosexual love story( either men or women) but at the end one committed suicide or got killed. The teacher finally made me “get” Georgia O’Keeffe. Well I am rambling. Keep going. oh one last thing. You are very brave because at least here if you are over 40 you are not sexually desired. There is a lot of age-ism in the commnunity here. Also the young guys are doing meth and not safe sex and thinking it’s OK to get AIDS cuz there are meds. But I have one gay boyfriend who was supposed to die at least 10 years ago- they actually told him he had 6 weeks. He takes the meds but the side effects on him are awful.(he is a jewelry teacher and can hardly see)
    Love and hugs,
    nanci

    • 06/13/2010 2:03 PM

      Thanks for checking in, hon.

  2. cloverbell1280 permalink
    06/13/2010 1:49 PM

    Keep it up. You’re doing great. Love your writing.

    • 06/13/2010 2:03 PM

      Thanks. Very much.

  3. Steven permalink
    03/09/2012 5:27 PM

    I am delving in and marinating in your words.. terrified, encouraged and obliged. Thank you.

    • 03/09/2012 8:53 PM

      Glad you’re encouraged. Hope you can get over feeling terrified and/or overly obliged.

      It’s interesting that you feel you are more out to others than to yourself. A very perceptive remark, and one that shows a degree of self-knowledge lots of people don’t have. I think it will be a good guide for you.

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